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| Working away on my novel kind of diligently.... I've realized that writing fanfiction has put me at a huge disadvantage: in fan fic I don't need to describe my characters. But I think the only descriptive feature of Katia I've put in Breakdown is she's tall. Might have mentioned she's blond. I know I have a little blurb written out as a note to include later that says she's Scandinavian. I have no idea what Ethan looks like. Well, depending on the conversation I do, lol. Pulling lots of things from my college life, including conversations between Katia and Ethan. My male harem condensced into one human being.
Oh, and for anyone who's wondering, my name over at the NaNo forums is simply Ange.
Word count: 3525 | | |
| Doubled my word count in a day! Woot! 3,096.
Continuing from yesterday's entry....
Katia could feel a blush creeping up her cheeks. “Thanks.”
“After you,” Ethan said. Katia shot him a sharp glance, trying to signal that ‘ladies first’ fell into the same category as opening doors. “Hey, this way I won’t be tempted to open a door for you,” he explained.
Katia laughed, partly at her own seriousness over the situation. It’s not a big deal. Losen up.
Chapter Two
Ethan shook his head, uncomprehending. “But what’s wrong with titles based on gender? A waitor is a male server, a waitress is a female server.”
“But there you go, it’s the exact same job. Why do they need different titles?” For the first time since coming to college, Katia felt like she was having fun. It’d been a long time since she’d been able to debate feminism, since all of her friends back home were either long converted to her feminist ideals, or knew better than to bring the subject up. More than one person’s blood had been shed after they’d refered to statuesque Katia as a mere ‘actress.’
Ethan was still shaking his head. “Okay, okay. I’ll concede. This time.”
Katia arched an eyebrow. “Until you come up with a better argument?”
“Maybe,” Ethan said slyly.
Katia laughed lightly, but had nothing else to say on the subject, or any other one. As was her habit when she didn’t know what else to do, she focused her attention on her bracelets. Her left wrist had 16 soft plastic bracelets on it. Two for each color of the rainbow, three glittery black ones, and a random aqua bracelet stolen from a friend before she left for school. When bored or embarassed, Katia, almost obsessively, turned her attention to putting the bracelets in order. A black one, followed by six colored ones in rainbow order, another black one, the last six colored bracelets, the last black one, and her random aqua bracelet.
Ethan, also feeling slightly awkward, noticed Katia’s careful organizing. “Are those for anything?”
Katia looked up quickly. “Hm?”
Ethan nodded at the bracelets. “Do they mean anything?”
Katia absently fingered the bright plastic. “Yeah, they’re my pride bracelets.”
“Pride?”
“Yeah. Gay pride, you know?”
“Oh!” Ethan said quickly. “Yeah, of course.”
“You didn’t know that?”
“Well, I know what the rainbow flag means, but I’d never seen it in bracelets.”
Katia shrugged. “My city is really conservative. I didn’t want to shout it from the rooftops, especially considering I wasn’t out to my dad. This was the most obvious way for me to be out.”
“Oh, well, that’s cool,” Ethan said enthusiastically. “How about your – well, other people back there?”
“Well, all my friends know. It took awhile to get there, but eventually they found out. And my mom knows, too. Really, it’s just my dad I’m holding out on.”
“Any reason?”
“Dad’s as conservative as the rest of the town. When I was first coming out I was half afraid he’d try to kick me out of the house, or withold college funds. And now it just seems awkward. I’ve been out to my mom for two years. How do I explain that to my dad?”
“Yeah, I can see how that’d be kind of awkward.”
There was another pause, and Katia returned her attention to her bracelets.
“How about here?” Katia glanced up at Ethan. “Are you out here? To your roommates and everything?”
“I’m out to everyone I take to, pretty much. I don’t want to go through all the stress high school gave me.” She snorted out a laugh, “Besides, my roommates thought the best way to start their first conversations with me was to ask if I had a boyfriend.”
“You’re serious?” Katia nodded. “Wow. I mean, I did ask my roommate if he was dating anyone, but it wasn’t the first thing I asked him.” Ethan paused. “So do you have a girlfriend?”
“No,” Katia answered abruptly.
Ethan shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “Hey, you know, I’m sorry if I’m asking too many questions. I do that sometimes. Feel free to tell me to shut up any time.”
Katia sighed. “It’s all right. It’s just me. I had a girlfriend during the winter, the breakup didn’t go so well, then it was just awkward this summer…it’s a story I’ll save for another time.” She forced a smile, “After all, I need to make sure I see you again.”
“Of course you will,” Ethan assured her. “But I’ve gotta go. Homework, you know.”
“Already?”
“Yeah. Math.”
Katia couldn’t suppress her grin. “I don’t have to take math.”
“How?”
“ACT scores.”
“Oh, you suck,” Ethan said, mock serious.
“Not my fault I’m a genius.”
“Are you seriously?”
Katia laughed. “If I was, do you think I’d be stuck here? Geniuses go to Harvard, not Eastern.”
“Point. I suppose. Hey, do you have a cell phone number? Then we can get together again before the next Players meeting.”
“Yeah, I’ve got it in here.” Katia dug in her purse to pull out her cell phone, while Ethan grabbed his from his pocket. Like the technologically savvy college students they were, they opened up the phone books on their respective phones, then traded phones. It was easier to type in numbers than dictate them.
“So I suppose walking you back to your dorm is out?” Ethan asked when he and Katia had exchanged phones again.
Katia glanced out the cafeteria windows. “The sun’s hardly begun to set. I’m pretty sure it’s still safe for a girl to wander about on her own.”
“If you’re sure.”
“Positive. I’ll see you around, Ethan.”
“Bye, Katia. It was awesome talking to you.”
“You, too!” Katia called over her shoulder as she and Ethan walked towards opposite exits.
It was all Katia could do to not grin like an idiot as she walked thorugh the warm late summer evening back to her dorm, Downing Hall, the campus’ all-female dorm. Her friends back home had claimed Katia had a dark ulterior motive behind moving into a dorm with only women in it. Wait until they hear that my first real friend here is a guy. That should shut them up. Katia smirked and shook her head at herself. No, it wouldn’t. She’d yet to meet anyone stubboner than some of the people in her group of friends back home.
After climbing up four floors to her room, Katia was relieved to find it empty. She was lucky to only live with two roommates, when the room setup was for four women total, but the two roommates she had, Lydia and Kylie, were exactly like all the girls Katia had tried avoiding in high school: superficial, obsessed with looks and money and boys. The three of them usually got along all right, but as soon as the conversation gravitated towards men or fashion, Katia focused her attention to her computer and tuned them out. She feared for her sanity if she didn’t.
As she always did when she wasn’t in class or sleeping, Katia sat herself in front of her computer. The computer was the only thing keeping her from having the world’s worst case of homesickness. Home was three hours away, and no one from her school, or even her city, had come to Eastern. Ever, as far as Katia knew. So every spare moment for her was sitting in front of the computer, instant messaging or e-mailing friends from home.
But tonight no one was on-line. Katia started checking away messages and saw her friends still in high school were at auditions for their school play. Her friends who were in college closer to home were all allegedly doing homework.
With a sigh, Katia closed her buddy list and went to check her e-mail. One new message, from her mother. No Earth-shattering news in there, simply reminders to study and take care of herself. Katia deleted the message without replying. What could she say? Leaving her e-mail box, she absently started surfing the web. No real destination in mind; it just gave her something to do.
I’m pathetic, Katia thought a few hours into her listless web browsing as she found herself going to the website of her hometown newspaper. Of course, nothing exciting was happening in Holland, land of tulips. Nothing ever did. That’s why Katia had wanted to leave in the first place.
“And now I just want to go home,” she muttered. “I’m never satisfied.” She pushed her chair back from her desk, then stood up and stretched.
As she did so, she heard the sounds of laughter outside the door and a key in the lock. A moment later Lydia and Kylie burst through the door, nearly collapsing in laughter.
“Hi,” Kylie gasped when she saw Katia. Kylie was generally the more social and likeable of Katia’s two roommates. Lydia spent most of her time in front of her computer as well, but unlike Katia she actually skipped class to be in front of it. Katia was pretty sure that was the sign of an Internet addiction, especially considering she was always playing poker and black jack on-line.
“Hi,” Katia said. “What’s so funny?”
Kylie shook her head. “Nothing, just some idiot guys downstairs, trying to flirt with us as we entered the building.”
“And that’s funny?” Katia wasn’t a stranger to attention. She was tall, with typical scandinavian blonde hair and blue eyes. Attention was something impossible for her to avoid. But she didn’t appreciate that attention, or find it funny.
“You had to be there,” Lydia said.
“Oh, yeah.” Katia smiled weakly. “Anyway, I’m going to bed.”
Kylie looked at the digital clock sitting on top of the TV. “But it’s only 11 o’clock!”
Katia shrugged. “I’m tired.”
Kylie and Lydia shrugged again, before colapsing into another fit of giggles as Katia shut herself away in her bedroom.
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| Mwaha. Trying to come up with plays and such was too difficult. So I slightly changed the direction of this and now have written 1,468 words 
Katia Johnston stood in front of the closed classroom door. This is it, she thought to herself. My first college theatre experience. College classes had officially started for Katia just one short week ago, and already extra-curricular clubs were starting, including Players, the college equivalent of her high school drama club.
If only she could open the door.
She had no idea who she’d find behind the door. She’d spoken with a few people at the informational theatre meeting held during her second day of orientation, but she wasn’t sure she could remember the faces of those people, let alone their names. In a week Katia had met a dizzying number of people; half the time she had to pause before remembering the names of the girls who lived in the room across the hall from her.
Katia shifted her weight from one foot to another, hating the feeling she had in the pit of her stomach. It wasn’t the first time she’d felt insecure since coming to college. She’d had the same feeling of dread when she was about to open the door to her dorm room and meet her roommates for the first time. But this was a meeting of theatre people, who had always been a second family for her. A drama club should have been the most comfortable place to be on this unfamiliar campus.
I could leave now, she thought to herself. This wasn’t a rehearsal or an audition; simply a club meeting. No one was expecting her.
While she was debating whether to go in or go back to the dorm for a lonely afternoon in front of her computer, Katia heard footsteps entering the hall from behind her. To delay making any decision, she practically jumped to the drinking fountain just to the right of the classroom door and began taking deep gulps. She glanced up as the owner of the footsteps approached, catching his eye and realizing he was indeed one of the people she’d spoken to at the informational meeting, making him either a transfer student, or freshmen like her.
Of course, she couldn’t remember his name.
The boy smiled as he approached Katia at the drinking fountain. “Hi,” he said in a friendly tone that obviously said he recognized her. Probably even remembers my name. “You going to the Players meeting?”
“Um, I guess. Yeah.”
“Great,” he said with a large, genuine smile. Katia couldn’t help but smile back, albeit hesitantly. She wasn’t used to having people be so friendly on their initial meeting; she usually sent out some sort of vibe that could even put theatre people on edge. But she couldn’t say this was a bad feeling.
If only she could remember his name, everything would have been perfect.
“Here,” Michael said as he stepped around Katia and reached for the doorhandle, “let’s go in.”
“I can get the door myself you know,” Katia snapped as Michael put his hand on the handle. Oh, great way to keep a potential friend, Katia. It’s a little early to start on the feminist schtick, don’t you think?
“Um, I’m sure you can,” the boy said hesitantly. “I never said you couldn’t.”
“I know,” Katia said quickly. “I’m sorry. I have everybody back home pretty much trained to know that they don’t open doors for me.” A brief, awkward pause followed, until Katia quickly grabbed the door handle and entered the room.
About thirty desks were arranged in a circle around the perimeter of the room, with maybe half of them already filled with other students, none of whom Katia recognized. Katia could feel her face beginning to flush, out of anxiousness at being in a new surrounding and embarassment over her exchange with the boy, as she slipped into a desk near the door.
The boy, however, was persistant and took the seat next to her. “Hey, uh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you or anything.”
“No, I’m sorry,” Katia mumbled. “It’s kind of stupid, even I’ll admit that.”
“What is?”
Katia sighed and turned in her seat to face the boy. “Okay, the whole door-opening thing…while most people see it as being polite and chivalrous and all that crap, I just find it annoying. There’s no need for chivalry anymore. Women have proved that we don’t need to be taken care of by men anymore.”
“I wasn’t doing it to condescend or anything. It was just out of politeness. I open doors for everyone.”
“But it was unnecessary in this case,” Katia insisted, feeling bolder now than she ever had since coming to school. “And sure, you may have been raised to do it for everyone, but to me its just one of those little things, invisible to most people, that symbolizes everything women have been fighting against for the last thirty years.”
“Wow. You’re pretty passionate about that, aren’t you?” the boy asked. Katia shrugged sheepishly. “Anything else I should know to avoid offending you?”
Katia thought for a moment. “Well, if you value your life, you won’t call me an actress.”
“What?” the boy asked, incredulous, just as another one of the guys in the room spoke.
“I think this is everyone we’re going to get for now. Welcome to the first meeting of Players.” He was interrupted by a brief smattering of applause from some of the students who looked like upper classmen to Katia. She, the boy next to her, and a few other nervous looking students joined in for the last few claps. “Thanks,” the guy said before continuing. “My name’s Dave, I’m the president of Players this year. Before we start talking about our plans for Players this year, I thought we’d take a few minutes to just go around the group and introduce ourselves, starting with the Players’ treasurer here,” he looked to the young woman on his left.
“Yeah, I’m Pam, the treasurer for Players this year, like Dave said.” She glanced at Dave, “What else?” she asked rhetorically. “Oh, I’m a senior, graduating on time, unlike certain other people,” another glance at Dave came here, “and I think that’s it.” Pam turned to the next person in the circle, which happened to be the boy next to Katia.
“Uh, hi,” he said, his friendly smile plastered on his face but his voice giving away his nerves. “I’m Ethan. Thompson. And I’m a first year student.” He looked to Dave and Pam. “Is there anything else?” Dave shook his head. “Well then, next,” Ethan said with a smile for Katia.
“Katia, first year student,” she said quickly, then looked to the next person in the circle, deflecting attention from herself as quickly as possible.
Katia carefully observed the other students as they introduced themselves, trying earnestly to remember names and faces together. By the time all the members of the circle had introduced themselves, however, Katia figured she knew the names of maybe five people, including Dave, Pam and Ethan. But it was a start.
Katia relaxed as the meeting went on. It wasn’t very different from her high school drama club meetings. In fact, the only difference between this introductory meeting and the introductory meeting of her freshman year of high school drama club was the lack of a teacher at this meeting. They discussed ideas for activities for Players to take part in, and from the first year students Dave and Pam extracted ideas based on their high school drama clubs. By the end of the meeting, Katia knew she’d be coming back the next week.
When Dave announced the end of the meeting, Katia bent over in her seat to pick up her purse. When she stood up she saw that Ethan was apparently waiting for her. “So what’s this business about you not being an actress?” he asked.
Katia laughed easily. “That’s a long story. You sure you want to hear it?”
Ethan glanced at his watch. “It’s six o’clock. I’m hungry. Why don’t we discuss it over dinner?”
Katia hesitated before answering, scrutinizing Ethan’s face, trying to figure out what his motivation for the dinner invitation was. A casual dinner between prospective friends? Or did he have the gall to try asking her out on a date already? She glanced at the rainbow of bracelets on her wrist and realized, hardly for the first time, that she needed a more obvious way of declaring her sexual orientation to prevent awkward encounters like this one.
Ethan noticed Katia’s hesitation. “It’s not a date or anything, don’t worry. I have a girlfriend back home. You just seem like an interesting person.
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| So as of last night I was at 303. I'm now at 525 words. Not a bad start for less than an hour's worth of writing. In theory, catching up shouldn't be too hard.
Here's what I have so far:
Katia Johnston stood in front of the closed classroom door. This is it, she thought to herself. My first college rehearsal. College classes had officially started for Katia just one short week ago, and already she was in rehearsal for her first college production.
If only she could open the door.
She had no idea who she’d find behind the door. She’d spoken with a few people at the auditions, but hadn’t learned their full names so she had no idea if anyone on the cast list was someone she’d spoken to.
Katia hated this feeling. It wasn’t the first time she’d felt insecure since coming to college. She’d had the same feeling of dread in the pit of her stomach when she was about to open the door to her dorm room and meet her roommates for the first time. But the stage was Katia’s second home; rehearsals should have been the most comfortable place for her to be on this unfamiliar campus.
While she was still debating entering the rehearsal room, Katia heard footsteps entering the hall from behind her. To make an excuse for being outside the room, rather than inside where she belonged, Katia practically jumped to the nearby drinking fountain and began taking deep gulps. She glanced up as the owner of the footsteps approached, catching his eye and realizing he was indeed one of the people she’d spoken to at the auditions, though she couldn’t come up with his name.
“Oh, hi,” he said when he recognized Katia. “So you made it into the show?”
“Yeah,” Katia said. “I’m a wedding guest.”
“Hey, so am I!”
Katia forced a smile. “Great.”
“Come on, let’s go in.”
Katia followed the boy into the rehearsal room, trying to figure out a tactful way to admit she’d forgotten his name.
A girl Katia recognized from the auditions stopped her and the boy when they entered. This girl hadn’t been an auditioner, but had been keeping track of the call list so everyone went in order. “Are you in the cast or on the crew?” she asked.
“Cast,” the boy answered firmly.
“Here, fill these out then,” the girl said and handed each of them two sheets of paper. “One is your health form, the other is your publicity information. Fill them out and get them back to me as soon as possible. Scripts are at the front of the room. We’re going to start in a few minutes, but you can get started on your papers now, hint hint.”
“All right, thanks,” the boy said cheerfully. Katia mumbled her own thanks and followed the boy to grab scripts and find seats along the back of the classroom.
Looking around as she sat down, Katia remembered a few people in the room from her call back audition, but no one she’d talked to. It looked like for the time being it was going to just be her and this boy. Katia glanced at him as well and saw him filling out his publicity sheet. She scanned it quickly and found his name printed neatly at the top: Ethan Thompson. That’s one mystery solved.
The story is very much based upon a fan fic I've written, Breakdown (I'll post a link later), but originalized and expanded upon. For example, in the fic Rachel broke down because she couldn't handle life after the war. In this novel, Katia's going to to breakdown from the stress of college life.
Let's pray this doesn't become autobiographical (though I'll be the first to admit it already has some autobiographical elements. Katia is going to partly be me, and Ethan is going to be a compliation of several of my friends out here).
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